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DaRk AnGel : Why Home : December 2004
Oceans...
December 3, 2004 21:30
I wish I could take it away from you… I have borne that weight before and survived and flourished. I have seen the times when all I was washed up on an unknown shore in pieces - smashed by the wind and the rain and the sea. The pain of you is such a heavy burden... (Read Article)
Storms.....
December 6, 2004 21:23
The darkness of the night is shattered by the thunder; silence replaced with the loud booms forecasting destruction. The old dog comes and lays by my feet for protection.
Does she know that she is old? Does she know that she has lived past the average age of what they say she will? She has loved me like no other person ever could. In return I have done well by her - but not the best that I could. Seems now that she is almost gone, I regret every time she passed and I did not reach out and scratch her neck. I never threw the ball long enough or enough to where she wanted to quit. I left her alone while spending hours away doing inane things in the search of distraction. And at times I was angry with her, when actually I was angry at something totally different.
I have been an ungrateful owner. I would do anything to have her live forever just so I could totally let her know how much I so appreciate her. Every morning, when the first eye opens it looks to see her chest moving, fearful that death would have come during the night.
People do treat their animals as they treat their loves.
If you have a love, make every moment special. Do more than just harbor her when the storms come through. You'll both feel better about you…
The Least I Can Do For A Friend
December 8, 2004 20:18
After hanging up the phone, I realized that I was living the second darkest moment of my life. Not that she said or did anything that was improper or insulting. But maybe because I listened and heard.She has changed so much in the past year. I remember times... (Read Article)
Nothing But Time.....
December 11, 2004 18:51
The letter came back.. Not deliverable as addressed.. The good news is that I was not just dismissed. I will not be deterred to find those I wish to thank from my past. I never do well this time of year. There is not a thing in my house to even hint at the... (Read Article)
S.A.D and She....
December 21, 2004 22:13
Sometimes silence Speaks volumes…And sometimes a few wordsCan make a sad tearSmile…All the gifts in the worldCannot surpassOne unselfish act....From someone whoHas never before seenHow much they stoleWith the volumes they spokeSaying Nothing….Merry Christmas…... (Read Article)
A truth of life...
December 22, 2004 22:38
The worst feeling in the world
Is feeling totally unloved
By one
Whom you love totally
My wishes...
December 23, 2004 20:42
Ice is hanging from the eaves. The new dog feared the snow that gently fell most of last night only to vanish. Amidst it all the flying squirrels shivered running up and down the black oak eating what the gray squirrels had left behind. Like a day shift and... (Read Article)
Merry Christmas....
December 24, 2004 19:18
My bottle of Gin awaits me.. Bombay instead of the cheap stuff for a change..It numbs the pain, the senses, and the loneliness...My gift tonight to you is THISIt should give cause to think.... (Read Article)
Christmas 2004
December 25, 2004 19:44
After I got off the computer last night, I lit a fire and got the dogs their Christmas eve gifts. Each got a hambone that Hartz put out for dogs.. I thought with it being a name brand that it was a neat thing for them..Boy was that the beginning of a mess…... (Read Article)
The Little Surprises......
December 25, 2004 19:54
A lovely lady, very near to me sent me an email Christmas eve.. And I responded, and then directed her to the site where my life story is outlined, expecting to never hear from her again.. I looked up her personal ad.. Looked into her eyes.. Hoping to catch... (Read Article)
New Years Eve - 2004
December 31, 2004 18:57
This has been a day of contemplation and of review. The past year has not left me much to be happy about. I count more losses than gains.. I struggled today to create some meaningful resolutions.. I thought about quitting smoking. About keeping the house clean.... (Read Article)